there, but for the grace of God…

via BBC News – Louis Theroux: Westboro Baptist Church revisited.

“What emerged to me was I was seeing a family that through its own tortured logic was involved in a long process of tearing itself apart, while denying at every stage what it was plainly doing. …Human beings who, in a weird way, are victimising themselves along with all those they picket.”

The Westboro Baptist Church is unfamiliar to me. Although I’d heard, over time, of a group of people picketing funerals, I was unaware of who they were or their larger agenda. I missed Mr. Theroux’s first documentary, which no doubt would have educated me. I’m grateful he made it. I’ve been reading the prophet Habakkuk lately, and noticed a phrase I find soundly refreshing, and hope characterizes Mr. Theroux’s work: “be exposed. The Lord’s right hand is coming around to you, and disgrace will cover your glory.” (2:16).

Now this passage is addressing those who exploit and victimize others to satiate their own greed. But doesn’t that seem to be what’s going on at Westboro? Somebody is greedy. For power. For fame. For devotion. For emotional energy. And they are seeking to legitimize and mask that greed in theological nomenclature.

With each step taken following that somebody further down the rabbit hole, you make a decision: “I am fully invested in this relationship, no matter what” or “I can no longer support this outrageous behavior.” If you choose the former, it costs you your individuality, your conscience, your freedom, your soul. I was stunned, but not surprised, to notice in a video interview of Shirley Phelps-Roper that she maintained a constant grin despite the topic of discussion. And I was reminded of how I had to suppress all personal feelings in order to continue in my status quo. Others later commented on my inability to emotionally engage in life. There, but for the grace of God, go I.

In order to choose the latter option, you first have to relinquish all hopes for the future. For it could cost you everything – spouse, family, friends, home, financial security, safety, even your life. Lauren, a granddaughter of the clan was permanently banished for resisting.

I believe people don’t choose to become this kind of a tyrant unless they have hidden evil in their souls that drives them. Nate, a son of the founder, Fred Phelps, escaped his home and the church the moment he was emancipated. Thirty years later, he speaks about the abuse that took place in his home. Based on the little I’ve seen, I imagine there will be more to come. My patriarch’s demons were very dark, indeed. And looking back, I can see how they shaped him.

And I am grateful for a God who exposes…

winter’s bone

This isn’t the kind of film to watch alone on a dark and stormy night. Its not in the horror genre, but it is hard and raw and tense and angering. And after I watch a story like this I think, there are real people struggling through very similar kinds of circumstances at this very moment. And I’m grateful someone was willing to so effectively paint their plight.

Father, deliver us…

http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi3239184153/

…and there came flashes of lightning, rumblings, peals of thunder, an earthquake and a great hailstorm

I used to read the Revelation and wonder what would have to happen to cause military forces to revert to the use of horses in battle. Of course that would only be a question to ponder for those who interpret that book literally. But in that light, I find there are some possible drivers that would move people functionally backward. I found it particularly interesting that Dr. Katu specifically stated, “…we would be thrown a hundred years back into the past.” Maybe this isn’t the year for me to invest in an iPad.

you don’t look like anyone i know

Amazon.com : Watch an Author Video.

A couple of weeks ago, I heard Heather Sellers interviewed on NPR regarding face blindness, and her memoir You Don’t Look Like Anyone I Know. The interview revealed little of Heather’s personal background, but my immediate response was, “Face blindness sounds like something that could be psychosomatically induced by trauma. I need to read her story.”

Well, I just finished reading it, and there is no evidence verifying psychological or emotional trauma can induce face blindness. But…  she definitely had more than her share.

The most helpful things for me in Heather’s book related to her skill in communicating her own thoughts and feelings. She had incredible self doubt when evaluating her family experiences as a child. And as an adult, her mental battles and resistance to breaking free of the prison her disability had placed her in were very telling. She resists, and resists going public with her challenges. When she finally shares her struggle with friends and co-workers in a mass email, she discovers she may not be the only one in her circle with this challenge. And she quickly becomes a “face blindness evangelist,” pressing others to go public, too. You feel the burden being freed from her shoulders once she shines the light in her dark corner.

I saw a lot of myself in her distorted self-assessments, and mental narratives-to-self, projecting what she believed other people to be thinking – about her, about her parents as she was growing up.

There are some unanswered questions. But books can never give you the entire story. I am amazed Heather is so able to love her parents, in spite of her experiences. That, in itself, is very humbling.