conscience shopping

I signed up for Dallas and Chicago emails from DailyCandy, recently.  Today’s Dallas version showcased a new-fangled shopping mall called Lifestyle Fashion Terminal (LFT).  Of course it’s not for the economically challenged, garage-sale-thrift-store addict, like me.  But I find it’s core philosophies quite interesting.

As I read, I started comparing what they want to accomplish in their retail fashion cosmos with what we are trying to do at Coffee Ambassadors and the thoughts I have for The Aylward Community.  They mentioned ideas such as building community and relationship, being partners rather than users, being “a relentless catalyst for change” and selling “only brands that have real people behind them.”

On that last point, I suspect they hold to a slightly different shade of meaning than Coffee Ambassadors seeks to promote.  I don’t think they are trying to partner designers with individual purchasers, as we hope to partner churches with farmers.  But it’s exciting to see them breaking ground for people to step outside their purchasing paradigms.

Maybe the LFT will eventually benefit third world coffee farmers too, if we all learn to shop with the concepts of community, relationship, partnership, change and people in mind.

God, I’m a little slow on this one.  My priority in purchasing is always “economic bottom line.”  Can you help me alter my paradigm – my thinking and values in this area of my life – even if my financial picture doesn’t change?

take ‘em off

After Moses’ death and Joshua’s assumption of leadership of the Hebrew people to claim the promised land, Joshua encountered the “man” with the sword, as he first approached the city of Jericho.  He asked the man, “I am at your command.  What do you want your servant to do?”[i]

To his surprise, he was told to take off his sandals in worship.  His whole purpose in being there was to conquer the city in what would be the first of many maneuvers to take the land for the people of God.  I imagine him spending sleepless nights pacing, consulting his subordinates and strategizing, contemplating how to ready his men for the attack.  These men who were untried warriors.  These men who had spent forty years twiddling their thumbs in the wilderness.  Well, maybe not twiddling their thumbs.  They were probably designing armor, and forging weapons, and running mock war campaigns.

In the midst of my compulsive doing – my frenetic preparation, am I willing to set aside my solution long enough to stop and worship you, and your capability – a competence more than sufficient apart from me? 

Joshua had no need for extensive preparation, as you intended to battle for them.  How often have I wasted time frantically searching the internet for information, or running from store to store for an item, and calling or emailing contacts in an attempt to solve my problem, fight my battle in my own strength – only to have you nullify all my work and configure a solution in a completely different way?

Will I ever quit striving ahead of, apart from you?  Please remind me – frequently – to take off my sandals.

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[i] Joshua 5:14

not pretending

“…Taking this sinful world as it is, not as I would have it.”  That’s part of one of the twelve steps in Celebrate Recovery.  In the context of addictive behaviors, I would say, yes, that’s essential.  Being honest about the darkness and failings and incompleteness of our reality rather than pretending everything is acceptable and good.

But I need to be clear not to confuse honesty regarding my surroundings with contentment.  And I’m not talking about contentment with the lot God has given me in life, but holding out against satisfaction with this lesser, broken world instead of continuing to yearn for my glorious, heavenly home.

May I never quit asking, “Please come soon, Lord Jesus.”

whisperings

Am I confused, or what?  This morning before going to bed at 1:00 am, I listed on an American flight to Dallas leaving this afternoon.  Now, I am having this quiet unrest in my soul.  Are we just working on, refining, my ability to hear your voice?

I’ve noticed this feeling quite frequently lately, and discounted it as laziness, or lack of motivation, or fear of moving on.  And so I would take forward steps in spite of it.  And each time, the step proved unnecessary.  Like you were whispering direction to me, and I discounted it – decided what I was hearing was something else – something deficient in my own soul.

Last Monday, it was about driving downtown to submit my resume to United Airlines.  And because I thought, “real adults apply for real jobs, rather than sitting around,” I went anyway.  And of course the “rest of the story” is that the office wasn’t even there, and I unnecessarily spent $13 for 40 minutes of parking and $1.47 on a strange red imported carbonated beverage so I would feel like a customer that could use the restroom.

Are you fine tuning my ear?  Or is this about something else?

flagellations

Yes, I know that’s not a word. 

I’m going to have to quit researching the internet.  I was searching for some succinct information on the Scientific Method and discovered the following comments on a professor, Dr. Donald Simanek’s web page, which I feel compelled to discuss.  I should include this disclaimer that Dr. Simanek has some interesting information on his site, and we are all human, with our own understanding and opinions (which he discusses in his treatise on logic).

“Creationism arose from clearly religious motivations. For political reasons, its advocates found they could “sell” it better to non-fundamentalists if they downplayed the religious content and renamed it “creation-science”. But its essential content and goals were the same….Scientists recognize that the so-called ID [Intelligent Design] “theory” is not a valid scientific theory at all, and that its claims of supportive evidence from nature are contrived and easily shown to be invalid. But scientists now also realize they must not ignore this threat to scientific integrity, for it is part of an organized campaign with social and political goals and widespread grass roots support.”^[i]

A few ideas presented here intrigue me.

What is all this “social and political goals” stuff?  Is that what we get when we are outspoken – we’re called “political?”  We have orchestrated agendas?  I’m sure a few people who claim to be followers of Jesus have agendas.  But it’s not a big conspiracy for all of us.

And how can you say “creationism arose from clearly religious motivations” when creationism predates other theories and was held by most people, including scientists, for centuries and in countless cultures, until Darwin wrote Origin of Species?  And because those cultures have yet to read Darwin’s book, they still hold to a creation story.

I am also concerned that we who believe the Bible are seen as marketers selling an advertising scheme when we seek to tell or teach our ideas to anyone.  Are those telling or teaching other ideas considered marketers?  Marketing is basically carrying out an advertising agenda for the purpose of profit.  Although I hope to receive some of those crowns Jesus so clearly wants to give away, I don’t anticipate any other personal profit from telling or teaching what I believe to be truth.

And I’m not interested in manipulating anyone to hold my view.  There is no room for manipulation in the context of people’s interactions with God.  It’s not like he needs such efforts on his behalf.  The “almighty” in “Almighty God” is a little more powerful and infinite than that.

Dr. Simanek needs to qualify his “Scientists realize,” statement, as not only are the primary proponents of ID, scientists, but realization would require definitive truth as opposed to theory, which is what all ideologies, including Evolution, are – theory.  Perhaps he could say, “Some scientists believe.”

The statement, “claims of supportive evidence from nature are contrived,” could easily be restated by those who find various fossil evidence used by Evolutionists absurd.

I would like to note that I don’t have a strong opinion on ID.  I used to be adamant about such things.  But the more I know of God, the less concerned I am about some of those details.

God doesn’t need my permission to have used any particular method to bring reality into being.  The God I know is BIG enough to have wriggled his metaphorical nose like Samantha on “Bewitched” and – instantaneously, all of what now exists would have appeared – fully-aged.  He is also creative and interested and loving enough that he could have taken great care and enjoyment in fashioning the minutest details to perfection.  And I don’t mention how much time that might have taken because there was no time, no people around to keep track of it, and how much he wanted to use entertaining himself with a new hobby, is his business.

It is regretful that we use these issues to badger one another.  And it grieves me that Dr. Simanek has been maligned by some of us who believe we have to defend God, to the alienation of those we address.  Clearly, I think it appropriate to speak up – but not to harangue.

Thank you we no longer live in an age of persecution for those deemed heretics, or Dr. Simanek and I might both be in trouble – dependent upon the leanings of the oligarchy.

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[i] http://www.lhup.edu/~DSIMANEK/philosop/creation.htm

holding back

“You did not hold back.”  That’s what Ben prayed in his opening prayer in church, this morning.  And he elaborated by delineating many of the instances in which you did not hold back in giving to us – in showing your love for us. 

“You did not hold back.”  With anything.  So how does that reflect on my response?   I hold back.  I hold back when you ask me to do things outside my comfort zone that cause my heart to pound and my throat to constrict – like make phone calls, or ask people for help (any kind of help).  When I say it out loud, or write it here, it sounds infinitely more ridiculous than when I just think or feel it.  And yet speaking it or writing this (confessing)doesn’t completely break my bondage. 

But in comparing such fears to your complete giving, I am more humbled, more embarrassed, more desirous of not holding back.  I am reminded of Paul’s comment, “the kindness of God leads us to repentance.”[i]  And yet Holding Back seems to have a stranglehold on me. 

In light of this, I slowly realize your Bridegroom love beyond extraordinary, and my Bride love, weak and shallow, trodden underfoot by Focus On My Self Interest.  And John says, “As we live in God, our love grows more perfect.”[ii]

I’ll have to claim that truth by faith, today, because there is nothing in my heart that reveals it to be true for me right now.  I need you to break the chains of “Holding Back” in my life.  Please.

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[i] Romans 2:4

[ii] I John 4:17

princes among men

Yesterday we fasted and prayed for Richard, a 32-year-old husband and father of one at Winnetka Bible Church who has been struggling with liver and colon cancer for about two years, now.  This morning at 8:00, the church was meeting for a potluck breakfast and further prayer for the family.  They will be meeting with the doctor on Monday for a revised prognosis.

This morning I was perusing the Winter ’07 issue of MoodyAlumni, the magazine for former Moody Bible Institute and grad school students.  There are always the compulsory sections with news – ministry updates, marriages, births – and deaths.  I noticed a 36-year-old pilot, husband and father of three, died in a plane crash in Louisiana.  And Todd, a 25-year-old musician and servant to the homeless in San Francisco also died of unmentioned causes recently.

I decided to review the video Nate’s friends made for his Texas memorial service while I remained home from the breakfast with a cold-stricken grandson.  Now into the fourth month since, I am starting to cry more.  I say “more.”  I don’t think I cried at all the first month.  Maybe it was shock.  Maybe I’m so practiced at denying myself feelings, I didn’t know how.  I’ve been recovering about seventeen years, now, but I haven’t made much progress in the realm of passion or grief.

I think I need to learn to dance…

I miss you, Nathan.